Moron magnet

The event described below is based on a true story. The situation has definitely occured, but the following transcript happened more in my head than outside it. Add to that my exaggerating capabilities, this is what you get. This is to warn all future moron type persons who might bump into me and think about starting off a conversation like the following or very similar to it.

Moronic Person 1: Hey! where do you work, btw?

Me: XYZ company ~smile~

MP1: Oh, then you must be knowing my good friend A?

Me: Ofcourse! 50,000 employees and I know exactly whom you’re talkin’ about! Isn’t that the cross dresser on the 7th floor?

A shocked MP1: I think you’re mistaken ~embarassed half-smile~

Me: Mistaken? No way! I know for a fact A is who I think he is. Ask him.

MP1: No, actually…A is a girl.

Me: Well, d’oh! Cross dresser?!


~dust hands~ That’s one MP down, a gazillion more to go.

For the record, just because I work here doesn’t mean I know every single person who’s ever set foot in this office. So unless your friend is a celebrity or has done something really really weird (like crossdressing to work, yes), don’t ask me that question.

Is it just me or does this happen to everyone?

What’s the most stupidest d’oh question you’ve been asked?


24 thoughts on “Moron magnet

  1. Agreed there are many “moronic” questions like

    “Did you shave off your hair?”
    “Did you come to watch a movie?” (In a movie hall).

    But IMHO, to ask if you knew of a colleague in your company to me seems not so moronic after all. I have spent a lot of time checking if some new friend I met now, knew someone in common. Like for example if he/she read in my college, I might ask some common people connect to….. That’s moronic, NO ?


  2. he he .. Next time take a different path …

    MP1: Oh, then you must be knowing my good friend A?
    You: No I don’t know him , what about him ??

    MP1:eh .. well.. nothing.. I just thought you would know him?
    You: Did he mention me? does he know me ?

    MP1: hmm never mind ..
    You: Its a big world.

    MP1: What ?
    You: Had I known him, the next thing you would have said is ‘Its a small world’ But since I don’t I guess its a big world.


  3. Well, if you are both in same company in same location, people may not know the logistics.

    Can you beat this:

    In Madam Tussad’s wax museum, after standing in line for 15 min to get a photo with George Clooney, “Who is that?”


  4. what’s the most d’oh question i have been asked? i was recently asked in office (in person) – so you have come to office today, priya? 😦


  5. It depends upon the social situation as to whether a fatuous question is acceptable. I am a loner and happy with my own thoughts or something to read.

    But I am sufficiently compassionate that, in enforced close contact, I will humour a person of lower intelligence who feels awkward without conversation.

    I am aware of the danger. Familiarity breeds contempt. The person might be a con artist.

    Having dropped out of sixth-form education and worked mostly in unskilled jobs, I am fluent in moron-talk so I can stay safe. One does not want to appear a toff.

    You do not say whether you are speaking of parties, pubs, weddings, funerals, at work in the canteen, in a hostage situation, behind a fallen wall in an air raid, on the upper floor of the second tower to be hit on 11 September 2001 in NYC…

    Cy Quick at


  6. Lol… Slighta at times I’ve been the moron but not this bad.. I generally prod only if I know for sure which dept/floor my acquaintance is .. πŸ˜›
    That makes me a semi moron eh?? πŸ˜›


  7. Hi,

    MP – Whats your name?
    me – Arvind.V

    MP – Whats your father’s name?
    me – Ravi

    MP – So V is not your father’s starting letter?
    me – woow!!!

    btw stumbled across your blog and blog rolled without permission. superb blog. Keep it going πŸ™‚


  8. I remember being asked this question twice.
    Oh are you a blogger? do you know my friend, even she is a blogger?

    And another I’m a student from this university. Do you kno Mr So and So.

    Okay cool babe! there are around 10k students in my campus!!!

    People get the thought that we’re rude once we give an answer. But I wonder like harry! Are they just look stupid or really stupid???


  9. I am sorry… i asked. 😦

    Next time, i will not ask about A. I promise.


    By the way, i heard that my friend’s cousin B is joining XYZ this monday.


  10. “Hey! Inga enna da pannre?” at the barber’s.. (I’ve got that on my way to the loo too!)
    perusa onnum illa, nuclear deal discuss pannrom..

    I can’t believe it’s been THIS long since I visited blogs (mine included!)

    hi, epadi irukenga? πŸ™‚


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