Long time no see!

More than 2 weeks since an update on this blog. One thought the world would come to an end, but one was very clearly mistaken. Now, wouldn’t it be a brilliant idea to have a Self-Writing Blog (like a Quick Quote Quill?)! Alas, one does not have such luxuries.

Looks like Mr.Murphy is doing overtime when it comes to my blog. The more often I update the blog, the less interesting things there are that’s happening around me. I keep off here for 2 weeks, and look what all happened –

– India wins a World Cup!

– People fight without even an ounce of common sense, on the Sethusamudram project

Dubya kills President Mandela, and reaches new heights of moronism

– India defeats Pakistan and wins a World Cup!

– Rahul Gandhi’s on his way to become like his father. We know now Manmohan Singh’s political days are counted. But wait a minute, weren’t they always counted? Gah, whatever!

– The rupee goes stronger against the mighty dollar. Repeat of 2001? I don’t know.

– ‘Eklavya’ is India’s official entry to the Oscars. Another WTH moment. But hey, not as bad as ‘Paheli’, is it? The world anyway thinks India still lives in the 13the century, so why not substantiate that with facts – facts like ‘Eklavya’.

– India defeats South Africa in the Super 8, defeats Australia in the Semis, defeats Pakistan in the finals and wins a World Cup!

– Shahrukh Khan has a 6 pack abs. Now we officially can’t differentiate between him and the rest of the hunks. Saying he looks gross is an understatement.

– Yours truly made kudumulu (that’s kozhkattai in Tamil and modak in Hindi and ‘steamed rice balls stuffed with sweet stuff’ in English – phew!) for Ganesh Chathurti and it came out pretty darn well! Yay!

– Yours truly also nearly fractured 2 of her toes, by stubbing them against wooden objects which weren’t even on her path. (Meaning, she literally went out of her way and stubbed them poor toes.)

– India defeats South Africa in the Super 8, defeats Australia in the Semis, defeats Pakistan in the finals, wins a World Cup and gets aptly rewarded with cash and cars. The hockey players are miffed. Can someone please tell them this is not the right time to complain? They’ll only make the country hate them for being such spoilsports that they can’t even enjoy a World Cup. A good time to complain would be when the Hockey World Cup (or any equivalent thereof) is won by India and people don’t stand outside the airport in rain to welcome them. It’s all about timing, folks.

– Lots of popular movies released, in Tamil, Telugu, English and Malayalam (the last Hindi movie I saw was Die Hard. heh heh). Moi has not seen any in the last 1 month. Yep, time to get meself some life.

– New books on one’s bookshelf. But absolutely no time to read. None whatsoever. Lots of new books in Crossword and Walden – but no time to shop either. Well, almost. The spouse conveniently avoids taking me near bookshops these days. I’m a dumb idiot who didn’t realize that until very recently. You’d think I was asking for diamonds and Ferraris! It’s just books!!! Sheeesh!

– Lots of draft posts (none more than 2 lines) in my Draft folder. No time, no creativity, no words, no nothing. Time to give up?

So while the world went and had some fun, some of us had to slog our backsides off for the gourmet meals and fancy sports cars. Unfair life!

You guys still do remember me, don’t ya? I was here a while ago. Just 2 weeks back. Remember?

 

P.S: I feel like crying everytime I see ‘Prose and Verse’. One creative bolt of thunder is all I ask for, Almighty God! One! just one!

P.P.S: Did I mention India won the World Cup?

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I was just thinking…

…when thoughts flutter by (like a butterfly? heh heh. I couldn’t resist.) in one’s mind, there’s little one can do but wonder how smart and amazingly brilliant one is. Yes, there is no end to the unfairness of this world.

   

  • Know these hi-fi presentations that your CEO (or any equivalent thereof) gives once in a while? Seen those professional looking models in some of the slides, who look like they’re working with papers, shaking hands, deep in thought or over the phone with a couple of papers in their hand? I mean, what the heck is that all about? You show me an icon that says ‘User’, I’m good. Is it just me or does anyone else find it highly irrelevant and slightly funny? 

  • Some days, one is the butt of all jokes. Most days one is not, but some days one is. And those ‘some’ days are terribly terribly terrible.

  • People have forgotten the word ‘excuse me’. Especially when walking out of an auditorium. They either don’t say it and barge through, or they don’t understand it when you say it and stand like some glorified mummy who once owned the strip of carpet they’re standing on. It’s called manners, people. It’s what differentiates us from a herd of elephants on a rampage (among other things, ofcourse).

  • Firefox vs IE. I gave up. I use both. (Yep, I’m that insane!)

  • When it’s supposed to rain, it pours. When it’s not supposed to rain, it pours some more.

  • We need to ‘nazar utharo-fy‘ (‘dhrishti suththi pottu-fy‘ in Tamil and ‘remove the bad effects of an evil eye’ in horribly translated English) for Hyderabad. All you jealous people who don’t live here, please to not show ill-thoughts towards my poor city. Enough tragedies. I’m too scared to take the elevator to the parking lot at home now.

  • I can’t remember the last time I had chocolate. (Oh wait, must be last week. But hey, last week is as good as never!)

  • I donno about other cities, but in Hyderabad, if you’re a policeman you can go to any high profile restaurant/pub, get drunk for free and bash up the other customers sitting next to you who dared to order food. I kid you not, I saw it happen. It’s disgusting. If I were in control of these scumbags, I would make them write lines: ‘Law-makers and law-keepers are not above the law’. Using Dolores Umbridge’s special quill.

  • I have a backlog of un-replied comments. But given a choice between putting the gourmet meal on my designer dining table and replying to comments on my blog, I choose the former. Please to excuse petty human being. Aforementioned human being will make it up very soon and be back to the regularly-blogging self. Till then…

 

P.S: If you’re wondering what’s with the weird colored/shaped bullets in the post above…well, that makes two of us.

Two sides of a biscuit

Picture this –

It’s 6 PM and you’re at work. And it’s a pretty long day, that ends in the near vicinity of 12 AM. The mid-evening pangs of hunger hit you from nowhere (actually it’s from the brain, but what the heck) and you fancy a quick munch from the 7 types of biscuits placed in the pantry.

(Now, stories from my work pantry often make an appearance on this blog. Please to click on the three links above to get a feel of that little room in the corner where the airconditioning doesn’t always work and the coffee is always crap.)

I have to mention here that of the 7 types of biscuits, only one is cream biscuit. Orange cream. Yes, that bad, I know. There used to be Britannia Bourbon long back, but then I’m digressing. So, here you are, craving a quick bite and standing in front of the biscuit box in the pantry.

Everyone who’s ever looked at a cream biscuit knows there are 2 sides to the story, I mean the biscuit. The ‘cream side’ and the ‘non-cream side’. The biscuit is no fun without the ‘cream side’, right? I mean, it’s as good (or bad?) as any regular Milk Bikki without the cream side!

So what do you see in the aforementioned pantry? Only 6 cream biscuits. Only 6. But that’s not a problem, you know – it’s not like I was going to stuff my face with 6 biscuits anyway. But here’s the real deal – there were only 6 cream biscuits and all of them with just the ‘non-cream’ side!!!!!! I mean, for the love of God!! I cannot believe someone would actually split all 6 (the only 6, mind you) cream biscuits and take just the cream sides and leave the non-cream sides!

What is this world coming to, I ask you! Isn’t there anymore biscuit etiquette left on this planet?! Like Calvin says, ‘It’s hopeless, Ms.Wormwood’.

What am I going to do now? Time to take my voodoo kit out tonight and see who comes to work tomorrow with a broken arm and two broken teeth.

P.S: I know what you’re thinking. She posts after a week and look what she posts about. But you know what? This is precisely why I maintain this blog – to rant about whatever whenever to whoever. Tough luck, mate.

P.P.S: Surprise of the week for me: Thought Process, for some strange inexplicable reason, is ‘featured blog’ here. Now what are the chances that they mistook me for someone else who actually writes well? It’s always a freakin’ adventure seeing how people reach your blog. Topic for another post, me thinks.

P.P.P.S: Where are my manners?! Thank you, Labnol.org for featuring me and above that, you all, dear readers, for being instrumental in all this featuring business. Can I please have my Oscar statuette and/or Nobel Prize scroll now? Thank you very much.